Talking to my friend Angelica today made me remember my favorite thing about life in the whole wide world.
You can do whatever the truck you want in it. You can be totally crazy and insane and a total douche, but none of that will matter. Everybody dies, and none of this will matter.
Screw social boundaries. If people think that being random and uncalled for and stupid is odd, or they hate me for it, that's too bad for them. I'm having so much fun in my life, and nobody's going to stop me. No matter what I've done, or what I will do, I will be doing what I want, on my terms. I will always find fun and happiness in my life, even if I fail out of school and can't find a job ever. That relates back to one of my previous posts where I said I'd always have a fallback.
Another thing, regardless of whether or not I'm having fun, I will always have served some sort of a purpose. If that purpose is for me to be a target for hatred or mockery, then so be it. I did something with my life. I had fun while doing it.
People probably think I'm super obnoxious, and a dumb piece of crap. Some think I deserve to die. I DON'T CARE. I'm leaving my legacy. My story, for future generations. They will learn from my mistakes, hopefully.
To everyone who dislikes me, though, I have this to say: have fun with that. Go ahead and dislike me. I'll always have myself.
I'm not sure why anybody who dislikes me would be reading this, but that's beside the point.
Okay. Wow. That was a lot. Sorry for the disconcerted nature of that whole... rant? shebang? exposition? harangue? (that's a pretentious word if I ever saw one)
Anyway, tl;dr, live life to the fullest and don't even care what everybody thinks. they can suck if they want to.
Also, to all my readers (both of you), Thank You. I'm glad somebody cares a little bit.
4 comments:
this was gurreat.
love ya.
I should take what you said to heart. Though a lot of you younger kids seem to think I'm cool (wishful thinking on my part?), a lot of kids think I'm a dork, particularly ones in my year. Like I know I'm awkward, and I try to be random and funny, but I constantly wonder if they're laughing with me or AT me. It makes me paranoid.
Everyone tells me to be myself and to not worry about it (basically what you're saying in different words), and they're right. But it's hard not to be self-conscious.
tehe.
oh angelica.
oh you.
love yas.
This is a radically different additude than any of your other posts.
It makes me happy that you're happy <3
and we can always be failures together. I'm pretty sure I'm gonna fail at life so if that happens to you we can be bohos and rent an apartment together and I can work at a bookstore and you can work at a coffeehouse and we can start an acoustic band :)
Love you.
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