Reassuring Thoughts

You know, something that I realized the other day while pondering my future, is that no matter what happens in my life, no matter how low I sink or how badly things turn out, I will still have at least two options of what I can do with my life.
I could either:

A. Join the Military. They'll accept pretty much anyone, as long as they're in decent shape and can do basic soldier duties. I think that I'd definitely be able to get in, even if I flunk out of high-school/college and never finish school, and I'd still pass the requirements. Plus, you get paid to do it, and it looks great on a job resume! This would be my main choice, or I could...

B. Turn to a life of Crime. This isn't even a joke. I believe that I'm intelligent enough to be in the crime business, AND I have family in the mafia who I could always probably join. I wouldn't mind all the bad stuff either, because I wouldn't really have anywhere else to go/anything else to do. Even if I got caught and jailed, it would totally be worth it because I would have been desperate enough to get into these circumstances! Oh, finally, being a Crime lord or something, maybe a vigilante, would totally be a blast, and worth the consequences.

So yeah, basically that's how I roll. Or will roll, possibly.

BYE GUYZE!

Something I realized

This week has had a lot of birthdays of people that I know, which got me thinking, "Why?"
"Why were there so many people born this week, of all weeks?"
Then, it hit me.
St. Patrick's Day.

That's all, really.
I think I had something else to say, but I forgot about it.
Maybe it was something about midterms?
Ooooorrr about how much I love my friends?
Whatever.
Doesn't matter.
Alllllllllrighty, then.
I'm just gonna go ahead and end this post now.

Ska

I recently discovered Ska.

Just today, I started listening to Reel Big Fish.

and I started using Chrome.

and Google is going to take over the world.

and I can't wait.

and I say and too much.

and I make dumb blogs too much.

but anyway, Twitter is cool, and so is Skype.

You should get on both.

Chemistry is getting me down

I would be doing well if it weren't for my fucking teacher and his analness about stuff.
I get questions right, but because I don't answer just how he likes it, or if I did it in the wrong order (e.g. Putting something in order from least to most instead of most to least, but still explaining it), or something like that, he takes off full credit, and I end up getting grades like a 5 out of 15 on a quiz.
Just stuff like that.
And I retain no information, even when I do study.
I usually end up only getting a bit of a higher B when I do, and it pisses me off.
And with people, if I try and be friends with someone who's just a total dick to me, no matter how hard I try, they're still a dick to me.
I feel like giving up.

Revelation

School is fun.
And by school, I mean actually being AT SCHOOL with all of my friends.
It's so awesome to know everyone and just have basically a giant extended family.
You know?
Like, all my home dawgs at school are basically just my brothers, and the teachers are all like my aunts and uncles.
It's extraordinary to feel so in place, like you belong somewhere.
That's one of the best feelings in the world.
Which is why people make gangs. To obtain a sense of family that is lacking at home.
Does this mean that I don't have a sense of family at home, or is it something different with my school experience?

Surgery

Today, I had to get 7 teeth removed.
4 were wisdom, and 3 were extra ones that didn't get to grow much, but would have if I didn't have any other teeth. Which would be an awesome thing if nobody brushed their teeth, and would lose them all the time.
But I do, and I don't, so it's not an awesome thing.
I keep having to spit up blood. It tastes kind of good.
I can't stay vertical for more than 10 seconds.
I have a headache.
I have a lot of teethaches.
I can't eat anything more substantial than applesauce, so I'm starving.
This is just generally not a fun experience.
Laying in bed, typing on my laptop....

Buuut w/e.
Peace out, just felt like blagging today.

Weirdness

My father no longer lives with me.
It's a difficult thing for me to grasp.
But, hey, that's how life rolls.

I realized today that the reason that I don't get the grades is because I have no short-term motivation, nor can my family afford to give me any, really. So it pretty much sucks. But I've decided that I will try harder in school, so that I can give my mom and dad money when they need it, and so my kids will be able to go to college without so much hassle. It just bites that I have to be coming into my prime right as a gargantuan financial crisis hits.
Boohoo.

I started listening to more ska recently.
And I "got" Panic!'s two albums.
The first one is way better.
I think that I want to do stuff with music, like maybe produce somebody's album or something. Not for profession or anything, but just for fun, and so I could feel important.
That would be fun.

Something really sad that I was talking to my dad about the other day was when he brought up the topic of his dream job.
He would've loved to be a music producer, and I really wish he got to do that.
But things just didn't go that way for him.
So he didn't get to accomplish his dream.
I really hope that that doesn't happen to me.
I want to do what I want to do.
I know that sounds redundant, but I really hope I'll be able to not regret my decision for a career.
I want to do something ambitious.
I just noticed the other day how un-ambitious my dad's job is.
He works for the government, and hasn't been legitimately promoted in a while.
I want to do something with lots of opportunity.
But whatever, nobody really reads this anyway.


"Who could love me, I am out of my mind..."